It happens from time to time that someone mentions off-handedly that they have lost something. I often feel inspired to help them find it using my not-exactly-patented thing-finding process. In no time our discussion has led to a eureka moment and the person heads off to check a quite likely location. And lots of times it turns out that they find whatever it is.
So it has become a personal challenge. When my husband lost his glasses in the back yard a few days ago I used my usual means to help him locate them. But it was difficult because he frequently jumped ahead in the conversation to dismiss my supposed idea of where the glasses might be. But the truth is, I have no agenda. I do not suppose to know where or even suppose to figure out where the lost item is. I always expect the person, slowed down to a conscious awareness of where the lost item was last seen and the events just after, to tell me where it is. How would I know?
But with my guy it didn’t work. He wouldn’t slow down and let me lead the conversation. He wanted to try to guess what I was doing. He was not being cooperative. So I was pondering this difficulty between us, and staring at the shelves in the garage wondering if the glasses had somehow landed there, a guess based on the conversation we did have about the sequence of events, when he came out and I confessed to my thoughts. Frustration with him.
This led to another conversation, mostly me complaining that he is a difficult customer for my lost-thing-finding-business. This led to another series of words that ended with us together, surprisingly, locating the three-days-lost glasses behind the garbage can.