On 60 Minutes this evening Steven Spielberg said that the worst thing that happened to him in his life was his voluntary falling out with his father. The best thing that happened to him in his life was his eventual reconciliation with his father.
For me, this is all about learning and growing. I feel that even though the experiences I had as a child left me forever sorry my parent’s were not more capable, because they certainly failed me in significant ways, after a lot of work in psychotherapy questioning myself about what happened and why, I was able to accept my parents along with their shortcomings. We had a limited time here together, and so the idea of fleeing from Mom and Dad, or being angry at them, or trying to get something from them they could not possibly deliver, was a losing idea. I needed to change my way of seeing things, and recognize that I have the ability to change the way I feel. I faced painful feelings before I got there, though. Eventually I could see my parents with compassion and accept and forgive the things that happened.
Change is possible.